Aphrodite is a Fangirl
by AphroditeisaFangirl
Summary: Aphrodite lives for Fangirling. Which is why she's often called 'The goddess of Fangirlism'. But now it's time to put all the fanfiction reading into action...her two favorite males together in holy matrimony? Oh yes. LeAx
1. Prologue

**Based off an experience with my friend and her mother, this is the prolouge to the amazingly stupid Aphrodite is a Fangirl.**

**And I mean _REALLY STUPID._ Hey, I get bored.**

**KH does not belong to me, it belongs to the Greek Gods.I would tell you which one in particular, but I'm afraid I'm not allowed to. And no, it's not Aphrodite.**

**Although she wishes it was. **

* * *

"Fuck!" Ohmygawdwhatthehell! That was Axel's reaction to his boyfriend, Leon, running in at full speed into the living room. 

"What _is _it, Leon! Can't you see that I'm _trying _to watch Gilmore Girls!"

"…You are so gay." No shit, Axel thought- thoroughly annoyed.

"Because you're just _soooo _straight. Now, what did you come yelling about?" Suddenly, Axel saw Leon's face go into utter shock.

"THE BIBLE-TOASTERS!" Okay then…what? Axel at that point officially decided his lover had gone off the deep end.

"What?"

"Don't answer the door."

"_What?"_

"They're at the door."

"…**_What?"_**

"THE BIBLE TOASTERS!"

"…You mean Jehovah's Witnesses?" Wow, and Axel thought that they were just fairy tales. Who knew they'd exist in Traverse Town.

"YOU KNOW THOSE ARE ONLY FAIRY TALES!" Leon had gone into a frenzy, banging his head on the wall and everything. His hair was all over the place, his eyes bloodshot, and he rather reminded Axel of a house-cat on steroids.

"…Leon. Hun. I think you need some sleep." Leon sighed deeply, leaning his back gently on the wall behind him.

"Probably. But I'm not going until you promise me not to open the door."

"Okay dearest." Axel figured that Leon had gotten so little sleep lately- partly due to himself- that he was just like…hallucinating or something.

"Don't call me dearest."

"Okay pookie." Axel could swear that Leon was the only person he knew who could both grin and growl at the same time. It was one of those weird things about Leon that Axel had fallen in love with.

"I'll let you get back to _Gilmore Girls _then," Leon said, rolling his eyes at Gilmore Girls.

Axel snarled. Yes, he liked Gilmore Girls. So phooey on you.

1 Hour later 

WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS WE WISH YOU A MARRY CHRISTMAS WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Okay, why did Sora have to mess with their doorbell again! He was always doing that.

Axel stood up, about to answer the doorbell, when he remembered what Leon made him promise. Oh well, that was an hour ago, and Axel was still sure Leon was just imagining things.

Axel pulled open the brown, wooden door and looked outside to see…

_Omfguh! _**_WHAT THE FUCKING HELL! _**

Bible…toasters. Toasters…with the word BIBLE strewn across them, flying around with little wings. There had to be at least ten of the fuckers!

Axel shrieked. He gave a high-pitched, girly, embarrassing shriek, and slammed the door- to see a half-dressed Leon running down the stairs.

"I _told _you not to answer the god-damn door!"

"Who the _hell _would send toasters possessed by BIBLES to our _house!" _Leon shook his head, letting his waist-length hair flying.

"I only have one guess," replied Leon mystically. He and Axel shared a meaningful look.

"No. It couldn't be."

"It must."

"But she-"

"Is a prankster."

"But she-"

"The Goddess of Fangirlism."

"It seems we can never rid ourselves of her…"

"Nope."

* * *

**FYI, I have the right to discontinue this at any point if I so desire. Which I probably won't.**

**And look out for the fic that I'm making that's really not as stupid, but is the same kind of thing. Yeah, Aphrodite is British in that one. **

**And only there for one chapter of it.xD The rest is just happy LeAx angst/drama/smexing/loving. **


	2. Briiiilllant

**Now it's time to get on with the REAL story shall we!**

**I get bored waaaaay too easily.**

**R&R BIZNATCHES! Such a fun word...**

* * *

Aphrodite stared at her computer screen, mumbling something about Sora going hetero on us and how she was going to murder J.K. Rowling with a sledgehammer for putting Harry with Ginny instead of Draco.

_I mean, damn it all! **I **give the orders about who fucks who! And they're supposed to be **males. **Jeez. I mean, who dares NOT put together two guys who make one of the hottest pairs like ever after all the trouble **I WENT THROUGH **to steal cupid's arrows! Hmmmm?_

Zeus glanced over at her and tapped on her shoulder, practically purring in her ear.

"My dear, is everything _alright_? Is there anything I can do to _help?"_

"_Can't you see I'm **FUMING **here! **Don't you try to seduce me whilst I'm FUCKING FUMING MY FANGIRL HEAD OFF!" **_

And with that, Aphrodite burst into tears.

Zeus, having _no idea _what the hell to do in this sort of situation, ran for the hills. Quite literally.

And somehow managed to leave a trail of poppies behind him. It is assumed that this is because he was trying to lure Goddess of Fangirlism into his lair.

He failed. He failed in a very spectacular way, for all she did was set all the flowers on fire.

But then her eyes brightened, her lips curled into a devilish little smirk, her red hair seeming to blaze and it is even possible that she might have grown tiny little horns on the top of her perfect little head.

She had gotten an idea.

The Goddess of Fangirlism was going to marry off her two most favoritest Kingdom Hearts characters.

Her heart practically burst from imagining them together. In CG. All those gorgeous, soft, red spikes sizzling into one of those delectable nipples as the beautifully carved, creamy face under those spikes used its full, red lips to-

Oh squee. Marvelous squee!

Mmm, and flipping it around. The cold, piercing eyes underneath those long, dark eyelashes- creating a bittersweet penetrating gaze slithering into the very soul of the long, lanky body shuddering underneath him. His chocolate hair falling in cascades, for he'd surly grow it out, around the pale and vulnerable neck just inches away.

Oh yes, Leon and Axel were simply a match made in heaven.

No pun intended.


	3. Asexual

**I GOT ONE REVEIW BIZNATCHES! WOOO.**

**XDDD!**

**And once again we have idiocy! Woo boy!**

* * *

Aphrodite stared at her computer screen.

Woah, dejavu. But not really. Aphrodite stared at her computer screen everyday.

She stared at it for exactly 9 hours, fourteen minutes, and about 37 seconds everyday. It's where she plotted.

And where she posted her fanfiction. Yes, Aphrodite wrote fanfiction.

Often Aphrodite was asked if she was straight or not. She answered, exactly, "I don't have _time _to be straight! I spend all my time making sure the **_smexy as all things ever _**bishounen _aren't _straight! Do you _think _I'd have time to be straight! Well, the answer is _no! _I'm _not straight! _I'm a fucking _Goddess of Fangrilism!"_

This of course meant everyone thought she was bisexual. Or gay. Which she wasn't. She wasn't anything.

Well, besides a perv that is.

But, could she help it if she simply jumped with joy every time one of her master plans worked? Could she help it if she squeeled seeing two men, madly in love, give each other their _souls? _No, no she couldn't.

Today, Aphrodite was searching for Axel/Leon Leon/Axel fanfiction.

Game. Kingdom Hearts. Romance. All Ratings. Characters: Axel, Leon. 

None?

**None?**

**_None!_**

_**Zero?**_

How could this be! HOW? There were fucking _Hermione/Dumbledore _fanfictions, BUT NO AXEL/LEON!

Ohmygodwhatthefuck.

How about Leon/Axel? She always preferred dominant Leon anyway.

No?

No.

Okay fine, she'd just have to think of a plot _herself. _

God this sucked. Yeah, she also had to learn to stop saying 'god' so much. After all, she _was _god. Well…**a **god at any rate.

But now what was she supposed to do? She didn't have a clue how to set people up, just how to make them fall in love.

And yes, there was a difference. Setting people up is just getting them to meet, getting that first spark.

Getting them to fall in love? That was making them well…love each other. Durh.

But Aphrodite didn't know how she would ever go about getting Axel and Leon to _meet. _Seriously, Leon was in Hollow Bastion (or, excuse her, **Radiant Gardens**) and Axel was…

Where _was _Axel? Aphrodite couldn't remember for the life…

Life. Ohhh. Right. Axel was uh…

Dead.

Huh.

Well that _did _pose a problem, now didn't it?


End file.
